The Miracle Of Adoption
Hello! My name is Zamira and I'm from sunny Tajikistan. I have a wonderful husband, Nasim, and four blessed children who are all grown now (2 girls and 2 boys), one of whom is adopted. I have learned much wisdom over the years through parenting as well as through adoption. As a parent, I have come to realise the importance of focusing on my own attitude, continually learning, imparting values on my children, and parenting with love and acceptance. As a result of these parenting strategies, we have seen miracles happen, especially in our adopted daughter.
Raising four children, I learned a very important lesson for myself, that when it comes to raising children, it is necessary to focus primarily on your way of life and your own attitude as a parent. Watch yourself, your behavior, control your mouth, and your actions. Because our children learn not only by what they hear, but even more so by what they see. Your children are always watching you. No wonder the English proverb says: "Do not raise children, they will still be like you. Educate yourself. " This does not mean in a literal sense that it is not necessary to educate and discipline children, but the point is that we must first educate ourselves as parents. We must ask ourselves what example do we want to give our children? Because they will project the same way of life in their personal lives when they leave us to live independently.
I, too, was not a perfect mother, especially since I became a mother early. Therefore, I had no experience how to treat children and what to teach them. And so I made some mistakes, but one day I realized that if I do something wrong, then I have no knowledge about it. From that moment on, I began to study independently, work on myself, change my character, communicate with experienced mummies, and read useful literature on self-development. My husband did the same, and as a result, our relationships and family life began to improve day by day. To date, we have grown-up children and the youngest son is 18 years old, and each of them has found their life purpose, and knows what to do in the future.
In the wise book of the Bible it is written: “If a child is trained up in the right way, even when he is old he will not be turned away from it.” (Proverbs of Solomon 22:6). In fact, in order to become parents, one must seriously prepare and from the very first days of the child invest the right things in him. That when he grows up, he chooses the right path and way of life. It is necessary to invest the correct values in the child from a small age, so that in the future he will be guided by them throughout his life. It is necessary to help the child to become a person with true principles, then he will not go the wrong way. May God give us all wisdom in raising children!
My husband and I knew Sayora from the age of 16 when she entered the Life Gate project. At this time, my husband and I were pastors of the Good News Church in Dushanbe, Tajikistan. We often visited the Life Gate project and had fellowship with the girls. This program first started by missionaries from New Zealand, Vinz and Christina. It was organized with the goal of educating and teaching girls from orphanages how to adapt to and live a normal life. Upon completing the two-year program of training for various professions, they began to live independently. It so happened that all the girls who finished the program found work and housing, except one girl, Sayora. This is how we met our future daughter, Sayora.
While Sayora was essentially lost in life and had a difficult time making decisions, God put it on our hearts to take her into our family. This was 2003. Then we already had 3 of our own young children. When we decided to take Sayora into our family, some psychologists who knew her did not recommend that we take her. Psychologists said that it can negatively affect our children. She was one of the most difficult girls in this project and everyone knew it. Nevertheless, this did not stop us and we risked taking her into our family. Then she was 18 years old. Honestly, from the very beginning, it was not easy for us, but with God's help we were able to impart into her the right values of life.
The Turning Point
Sayora was a very vulnerable girl, although she was already 18 years old, she behaved like a small child. She could shut herself up in her room for a whole day for no reason and not leave it. She did not respond to our questions, but simply answered that everything was normal. We continued to treat her with love along with great patience. And it did not last long until one day we had an open conversation. Only after she saw in us love and acceptance, she began to trust us and open her heart. As it turned out when she was 9 years old she was taken home from an orphanage by her father who raped her. After this incident, she was raped by other boys in the boarding school, where she studied.
Love & Acceptance
For this reason, she did not like herself and often became depressed. After hearing the story, we began to show more attention to her and helped her to accept herself as she is. After more than one year, we started to see results. Today she is a very successful person, she has two degrees in higher education. And now she manages the children in the boarding school, where she grew up. She shows them love and patience. She understands them very well because she herself went through this school. She is very grateful to us that we helped her to find the true way and not choose the wrong way. To any children you need to show patience and love, and educate them on the basis of correct principles, then these children will grow up the right person for society. Our love and acceptance is capable of doing miracles!
Hello! My name is Zamira. I am from the north of Tajikistan, Hujand but temporarily live in Kiev, Ukraine. I have 4 children, two daughters (one of them adopted) and two sons and a loving husband, Nasim. Our adopted daughter is 33 years old and her name is Sayora, Aziza is our second daughter, she is 22 years old, next is our son, Ibrahim who is 19 years old, and the youngest son, Fayziddin, is 18 years old. By education I am a teacher, pedagogue, theologian. When I got married I was 19 years old, and my husband was 22. Despite the fact that I became a mother at the age of 20, I still continued studying and am constantly engaged in self-education. It mostly helped me in raising our children.